Me or Us?

The use of “I” is a characteristic of shaytan, who prioritizes self-interest and egotism. In contrast, the teachings of Allah and His Messenger (sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) promote a consciousness and attitude of unity, solidarity, and togetherness. This is evident in the use of "we" instead of “I” in the ayahs and hadiths, as well as in the duas that we learn through them.

In this day and age, where whitewashing of the extreme individualism and egotism of the “I” is rampant and all popular contemporary culture is built on the pleasure and benefit of “I,” we have to relearn how to become “us.” Our Muslim identity and eternal happiness depend on our ability to prioritize unity and solidarity over self-interest and egotism.

“I,” said shaytan. He was driven by such conceit that he opposed Allah, whom he unequivocally knew to be the absolute ruler and almighty creator of all in existence—including every fiber of his being. He refused to obey Allah’s command to prostrate to Adam (alayhissalam).

When asked;

- What prevented you from prostrating?

He replied to Allah the Most High:

- "I am better than him." (Al-A'raf, 12).

Because of this, he was expelled from the divine presence. He was the imam of the angels but became the devil with this act of disobedience. He was stricken with arrogance, the disease that became his undoing.

Whose Cause Does the Nafs Call Us to Serve?

Shaytan was the first to use the word "ana" in Arabic, that is, he was the first to say “I”. The primary sins committed by shaytan are selfishness, egoism, ujb (pride), envy, disrespect towards humankind, and violating Allah's command by not prostrating. As shaytan is the veritable pioneer for these sins, he is particularly adept at ensnaring people with them. 

Sanctifying the ego and valorizing the pursuit of everything it demands is the way of shaytan. He is highly skilled at dragging people into the pitfalls of egocentrism, selfishness, and arrogance, which are often described as the most insidious diseases of the century: ones that fester and rot on the inside but have no physical symptoms that allow for a clinical diagnosis. Truth be told, he has been playing this game for far longer because egotism is his primary attribute, his first sin. It’s his most experienced field, the trap he's sprung on others the most.

This bloated sense of ego leads to diseases of selfishness, conceit, arrogance, envy and hostility. It leads to mistakes, exclusion, loneliness, unhappiness and loss.

Just as it lead shaytan…

Therefore, it is highly likely that the end of those who have this sense of ego will be like the end of shaytan. Pharaoh is the best example of this. When Pharaoh said, “I am your supreme Lord” (An-Naziat, 24), he joined shaytan’s caravan, putting his nafs on a pedestal to widen the rift between the heights his swollen ego aspired for—and indeed believed himself to be at—and the position of humility he belonged to as a creation of Allah. He even went further, and his ego led him to a sense of Lordship, as in the owner of the creation: a title exclusively reserved for Allah the Almighty. As a result, he was destroyed and drowned in the Red Sea (Yunus, 90). His was an end that spiraled inevitably towards anguish, just like the end of shaytan will be. His body, however, so to set an example, was saved (Yunus, 92). Per Allah’s ordainment and as it was commanded in surah Yunus, his body has been preserved until today and is exhibited in the British Museum in England. The corpse of a person who once claimed Lordship is now watched by people who take sobering lessons from his example.

Peace Be Upon ‘Us’!

"I" is the way of shaytan; it is one of his characteristics to always look out for number one first and place his ego above all else. The way of Allah and His Messenger is the attitude observed in people who think about the solidarity and togetherness enshrined by the concept of “us” first before their individual needs. In their way of addressing and in the prayers they teach us, there is only “we.”

The morals of our Prophet (sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) are also rooted in the unity the word “we” represents. When he met our Lord on the night of Miraj, he thought not of himself but of his ummah. He mentioned “us” in the presence of our Lord. The dua known as “at-Tahiyyat,” which we recite while sitting in salah, is the repetition of the conversations that took place while our Prophet was in the presence of Allah (subhanahu wa ta’ala) on the night of Miraj.

When our Prophet (sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) arrived in the presence of Allah the Most High, he presented his greetings, glorifications, and prayers to our Lord and expressed that all worship performed with the tongue, body and wealth belongs to Allah Almighty. Our Lord greeted our Prophet (sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) with:

-Peace be upon you, O Prophet, and the mercy of Allah and His blessings.

The Messenger of Allah (sallallahu alayhi wa sallam), on the other hand, did not say "Peace be upon me," but responded by saying "Peace be upon us and upon the righteous slaves of Allah."

This proves that Rasulullah (sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) thought of his ummah even in this most special meeting with Allah the Exalted during Mi’raj and that he always made the salvation of his ummah his utmost concern due to his incredible mercy and compassion for them.

The way of the ummah is the way of unity. While praying five times a day as if experiencing the ascension of Mi’raj and while reciting the dua we know as "at-Tahiyyat" in every sitting, we say "Peace be upon us."

In addition, in the last two verses of surah Al-Baqarah, which is one of the gifts bestowed upon us during Mi’raj like salah, we make dua for the ummah. When we recite these verses after Isha prayers, we say: “Our Lord, do not hold us accountable, if we forget or make a mistake, and, Our Lord, do not place on us such a burden as You have placed on those before us, and, Our Lord, do not make us bear a burden for which we have no strength. And pardon us, and grant us forgiveness, and have mercy on us. You are our Lord" (Al-Baqarah, 286), using the pronoun “us,” not “me.”

Hearts Joined in Prayer

As Muslims, our unity in iman, prayers, and action should be an inseparable part of our identity. Being united in prayers means praying to Allah as more than an individual, nurturing the hope that when one’s prayer for oneself may not quite be what is needed to bring about the change we need in our lives, praying with a heart concerned for other Muslims might make it a worthier endeavor in the sight of Allah (jalla jalaluhu). When hearts join in prayer across the world, when another Muslim utters the same words of prayer as us, unbeknownst to us, and with heartfelt sincerity in another part of the world, it might be just what we need to draw Allah’s mercy and grace upon ourselves.

So, when we pray to Allah for His forgiveness, mercy, and help, it behooves us to do so with a heart that aches for and shares in the pains and sorrows of every Muslim across the world, wherever they may be and whatever their struggle may be. The more we broaden the scope of our supplications to embrace our Muslim brothers and sisters with our heartfelt pleas to Allah when we pray for them, the closer our prayers will be to the guidelines and morals Rasulullah (sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) valued and taught.

Muslims are bound together in a powerful, unbreakable unity that transcends time and geography. Just as cells in a body work together in harmony to sustain life, so too do Muslims form a harmonious, interdependent community. When one Muslim is struck by hardship or suffering, it is felt by the entire ummah. The pain of one is the pain of all, and in this shared suffering, there is a sense of solidarity that is both profound and deeply moving. The bond that unites Muslims is more than just an idea–it is a living, breathing force that shapes and transforms every aspect of our lives. By embracing this solidarity, we tap into a wellspring of compassion, strength, and resilience that is nothing less than miraculous. In these times of trial and tribulation, it is the unbreakable spirit of Muslim unity that carries us forward, giving us the courage to face whatever challenges lay ahead.

The Danger of Loneliness

Islam attaches great importance to unity in belief and action. For this reason, as it teaches the principle of the oneness of Allah in all fields of studies related to iman, it also established principles that would ensure the unity of Muslims by gathering people together in the field of worship, such as pilgrimage and salah.

When explaining the verse "Hold on to the rope of Allah all together, and do not fall into division" (Ali Imran, 103), the great tafsir scholar Elmalılı Hamdi Yazır (d.1942) referred to this topic as follows:

“It is dangerous for someone to say, ‘I alone can protect my religion and faith.’ It is doubtful that individuals who want to be left alone and live a solitary life can die with a good end in keeping with iman and Islam. An individual can lose everything under coercion and pressure because Allah's mercy lies within the community (Tirmidhi). The greatest blessing of Islam in the world is in the establishment of this jamaat. That is why those who lose or bring devastation upon their communities undisputedly regret it at some point.

In the face of actual compulsions, theoretical evidence is often ineffective. In fact, even Prophet Isa (alayhissalam) asked, "Who are my supporters for (the cause of) Allah?" (Ali Imran, 52). Every believer is a focal point where a relative manifestation of Allah (subhanahu wa ta’ala) emerges. The real manifestation however is in the emergence of true unity that occurs with the unification of all relative manifestations. Therefore, unless all believers unite their deeds and work on one word and one cause, they cannot attain true taqwa.”

Again, in the interpretation of this verse, the famous mufassir Ibn Ajiba (rahmatullahi alayh) (d.1809) states:

“The Messenger of Allah (sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) said in a hadith:

– The Jews were divided into seventy-one sects and one of them is in Paradise and seventy are in Hellfire. The Christians were divided into seventy-two sects and seventy-one are in the Hellfire and one of them is in Paradise. By the one in whose hand is the soul of Muhammad, my nation will be divided into seventy-three sects and one of them is in Paradise and seventy-two are in the Hellfire.

When asked;

– O Messenger of Allah, which is the sect that will be saved?

The Messenger of Allah took his hands and said:

– The jamaat.

Then he recited the verse, ‘Hold on to the rope of Allah all together, and do not fall into division.’"

While explaining the tasawwuf-related signs of this verse, Ibn Ajiba (rahmatullahi alayh) says the following:

“Although there is disagreement on some of the ways that lead to the intended destination in the path of the Sufis, they all eventually converge at one point. People who judge and make decisions by and act according to the external, visibly manifest aspects of things are not like that. You cannot find them agreeing on anything with the exception of a select few issues, because their sect is based on prevailing conjecture (rational opinion). The sect of the Sufis, on the other hand, is based on the realization of the truth through experience and kashf. Likewise, the souls of the Sufis are also in unity. All of them embody compassion, mercy, love, friendship, and purity in their moral character, having immersed themselves in the depths of marifah (the spiritual understanding of divine knowledge), which has imbued them with the virtues of the people of Jannah. Allah (subhanahu wa ta’ala) says the following about the attributes of the people of Jannah:

“We will remove whatever bitterness they had in their hearts. In a friendly manner, they will be on thrones, facing each other.” (Al-Hijr, 47)

“I” Regret 

The way of the Sufi disciples, who not only firmly retain their consciousness of the unity of the ummah but also exemplify it with their lives, stands for undiminished togetherness, representing a united front that is a testament to their unwavering commitment to their faith and brotherhood. In the verbal affirmation of iman, when entering the fold of Islam by uttering the kalima-i shahadah, we say "I” by announcing “I bear witness.” In addition to the verbal affirmation of iman, the act of repenting and turning away from the path of shaytan and towards the path of Allah is a declaration of unity and togetherness. When uttering the kalima-i shahadah, one asserts their belief by saying "I bear witness." And in repenting and joining the united front of believers, one declares their commitment to this way of life by saying “I regret.” The use of the pronoun “I” here is needed to be able to say, “I am one of those who renounced the path of shaytan to be able to overcome my own nafs,” and not for self-praise or glorification.

Believers should take refuge in Allah from pride and arrogance. Through the teachings of tasawwuf, Sufis contemplate the insignificance of the nafs, the ego that swells with pride, and see nothingness as the core value of the worthy endeavor that dampens and eventually neutralizes the grandiose perspective that nafs has of itself. The sense of nothingness, the fact that no worth or value exists intrinsically in the self and that all worth is due to Allah’s judgment and favor, is brought to the fore. In order to reach the level of fanafillah, the sufi is determined to be “one” with his brothers at the rank of fana fi'l-ihwan, with his murshid at fana fi'sh-shaykh, and with the Messenger of Allah (sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) at fana fi’r-rasul. Thus he aspires to forge ahead on the path of unity that the “us” we say in our duas represents.

Sufis always strive to keep the feeling of unity alive and be with good people, externally by visiting their murshid and other Muslim brothers and sisters, and internally through remembrance. In addition, they know that even for people who have come a long way in their tasawwuf journey and the services they perform in the name of Islam, the disease lurking in the shadows is the sense of ego. They always maintain on the edge of their consciousness the thought, "This service we perform for Islam and Muslims does not exist thanks to me, but I am forever thankful for its existence.” For this reason, he does not allow self-congratulatory thoughts such as “I did it, I made this happen,” or “If all this would have gone sideways it wasn’t for me.” He doesn't get caught up in himself or credit himself for the success of the efforts. He upholds the mental outlook that defects, faults, and errors are due to the nafs, and success and blessings are from our Lord.

The Unifying Effect of Worship

Our worship, especially the basic principles of Islam, gives us many virtues. Our aim in our worship is to gain Allah's approval. For this reason, we start each worship by saying, "I intend to do this for the sake of Allah.” Worship that is not aimed at seeking the approval of Allah yields no rewards. The name and address on an envelope will determine where it gets delivered. By the same token, if the letter of intention enveloping our acts of worship is posted with the stamp “For Allah,” it will surely reach Him. For this reason, the basis of worship is iman.

Iman is like the foundation of a building or the root of a tree. Worship done without complete iman falls like a tree whose roots have rotten or a building without foundation. Iman is proclaimed with the kalima-i shahadah, proven by worship and strengthened with good morals.

It is clear that worship, especially the five basic pillars of Islam, provides many individual, social, worldly, and spiritual virtues, goodness, blessings, and benefits to the believers. In principle, worship is not done because of its benefits, but because it is the order of Allah and the way to gain His rida (pleasure). Furthermore, whatever Allah commands is for the benefit of people and Muslims. One of the most important benefits of worship to Muslims is the spirit that fosters solidarity over exclusive individuality.

Brotherhood in Worship, as Worship 

With the wudu performed before salah, a person gains physical and mental well-being by materially and spiritually cleansing his limbs, which are employed most frequently to commit sins. A society formed by individuals with good physical and mental health inevitably becomes happy. Salah also cultivates time management discipline in a person, and a disciplined person becomes successful. A person who abides by the times of meeting with Allah and his duties to his Lord also abides by his responsibilities towards people. A society made up of such responsible individuals finds peace. Salah establishes order in life.

In terms of moral enrichment at a social level, salah ensures the bonding of individuals, unity, and togetherness. Salah brings Muslims together, regardless of their social status, wealth, occupation, nationality, or ethnicity, and reminds them that they are equal as human beings.

Believers come together in the mosque to pray, standing side by side in unity. Their hearts beat as one, as they share the same religion, Lord, prophet, book, and qibla. The five daily prayers are daily gatherings, while the jumu’ah prayer is held weekly, and the eid prayers and hajj are annual and once-in-a-lifetime gatherings, respectively, that reinforce this sense of solidarity.

Zakat is another important ibadah that strengthens our spirit of solidarity. It goes without saying that it cannot be accomplished alone. Zakat is such a powerful gift of giving that it instills the giver with Allah’s quality of giving unconditionally and without anything in exchange. This ibadah, which protects people from stinginess and selfishness, teaches people to give and share. Thus, it provides love and balance between the rich and poor.

In addition to its health benefits, fasting has important effects on individual and communal morality. Outside of Ramadan, with few exceptions, it may be difficult for Muslims to fast for a whole month.

But because all Muslims fast together during Ramadan, hardships gently recede in favor of the ease that comes with the bond of faith. This shows that act of this worship is performed comfortably when it is done as a community rather than individually.

Fasting strengthens the will against the urges of gluttony and lust. A person who stays away from eating, drinking and physical intimacy from dawn till sunset learns to control their willpower. They eventually develop the will to avoid sins that harm society and themselves.

For instance, one who does not drink the water that is halal during normal times from fajr till sunset, will not take to their mouth any haram drinks like alcohol, which is the root of evil. If he has such a destructive addiction, he finds the confidence and courage to get rid of it. Again, a person who shows the strength of will to not touch food from fajr till sunset although it is halal on regular days will not have any cravings for haram food. He will let haram neither in his work nor in his food. Can a person who does not approach their halal spouse from fajr till sunset, approach zina (adultery), which destroys the family structure?

The arrival of the month of Ramadan brings with it a unique opportunity for Muslims to demonstrate their love and solidarity for one another. During this time, Muslims open their doors, hearts, and dinner tables to all their Muslim brothers and sisters, showing the essence of what it means to be part of a loving and generous community. Fasting during Ramadan not only fosters personal spiritual growth and self-discipline, but it also contributes to social peace and harmony. By thinking of others and sharing in the struggles of their fellow Muslims, individuals can attain a greater level of humanity and tap into the true spirit of unity that is at the heart of Islam.

Equal, One and Together in Allah’s House

The hajj pilgrimage, which is done both with one’s financial assets and body, is an environment where social cohesion and the spirit of unity are experienced to the greatest extent. In a way, it is the annual gathering of Muslims. Pilgrims, who are guests of Allah and representatives of Muslims, meet once a year to fulfill the fard of their lives. Wearing ihram, they rid themselves of all kinds of positions and labels and become equal. Millions of Muslims of different colors, races, and languages come together with their religion and hearts as one, rehearse for the gathering of mahshar, as if tasting death before they die in their white ihrams.

Just as in the mahshar, where people will be busy with their own problems and not be able to look at others, in Hajj, pilgrims must do their duty without looking at each other's faults. In the harem region, where millions of people gather, there is no place to find faults in others, fight, argue, quarrel, or break others’ hearts. One of the conditions of the pilgrimage is not to fight (Al-Baqarah, 197). Whoever completes the pilgrimage for the sake of Allah, while avoiding bad words and opposing Allah (by complying with the conditions of the pilgrimage) will return home as pure as newly born from his mother, purified from all sins. (Bukhari, Hajj, 4)

A Muslim who has been trained in patience and tolerance among millions during Hajj would have much greater reserves of these qualities to keep themselves from arguing or fighting with others. While doing tawaf around the Kaaba, walking between Safa and Marwa, standing on the Arafat mountain where Allah has ordered believers to stand among millions of pilgrims shedding tears in unity, while making dua, streaming down from Arafat to Muzdalifah, and flocking to Mina to stone the wall of shaytan, the pilgrims journeying towards Allah, the prophets, their brothers in Islam, both to the past and the future, the akhirah and their inner worlds, experience the unparalleled excitement of being a part of the gathering of the ummah on such a unique scale. They personally observe how big the world that is made up of “us” really is.

How United Are We?

In salah, fasting, zakat, and hajj, we experience the mindset of living, sharing and worshipping together in appearance. But how much of this outlook can we actually see in the Islamic world and our spiritual world today? Can we say with no feeling of guilt tugging at our conscience that we uphold this spirit if our nafs continues to insist on its barbed, bitter individualism while the word "we" flows from our lips when we recite surah Al-Fatiha? Are Muslims today led by an overblown sense of self or a spirit that unites their hearts and binds them to one another?

In surah Al-Fatiha, which we recite every day in our five daily prayers, we say “we” when we say "You alone we worship, and you alone we seek for help" (Al-Fatiha,5) as opposed to “I worship, I seek your help.” In the same way, when we say "Guide us to the path of those you have blessed and make us steadfast on guidance" (Al-Fatiha, 6), we pray by using the pronoun "we." Again, we don’t say “give me guidance.” We don’t say “Guide me to the path of those you have blessed”; we say “guide us.”

At the end of our salah, we end our prayers with the words in the "Rabbana" prayers representing the oneness of the ummah before finalizing the salah with taslim. While making tawaf during umrah or hajj, between Rukn-i Yemani and Hajar al-Aswad, we end our tawaf with the prayer of "Rabbana" as in the Sunnah, accompanied by words of “amin” from seventy thousand angels. “O our Lord!” We pray, “Give us goodness in this world and the hereafter. Protect us from the torment of Jahannam!”

We recite surahs and duas that begin with the word "we" and end with the word "we" in our prayers. At this point, the question that has long been surging like a tide in the back of our minds becomes inevitable: If we are performing the prayers that teach the way of living an integrated life as a bonded society and make us conscious of the spirit that imparts a sense of belonging to a life shared with others at an essential level, how far along have we come as an ummah in the trajectory laid out by these teachings? Our forms stand together in salah and hajj, but what about our hearts? Can we maintain the consciousness of unity even after salah or tawaf? Or, after the surahs and prayers we recite to complete our prayers, do we stray away from the spirit of unity and be consumed by the urges of our egos?

The Loneliness That Puts the “I” in Individualism

While there are many elements that bring us together and make us who we are, in today's world, we see many lonely and unhappy people in crowds around us. Though, it is understandable that those who suffer from ego and self-centeredness do not have many friends around. Self-centeredness leads to loneliness, and loneliness leads to unhappiness. People are alone in their own homes, outdoors, at work, in the cities and in their villages.

The means of transportation and communication have increased, yet somehow, sila-i rahim decreased inversely proportional to the enhancement in our ability to connect. Family members have distanced themselves from one another in the routine cycle of their lives that they have practically become estranged. The number of children who do not see their parents for years, or worse even children who do not know of their parents, started to swell uncontrollably. Even siblings living under the same roof come together only when there’s a guest coming over. Phones in children's hands, computers and televisions in every room occupy the most central space like a techno-epidemic. Today, a very awry form of superficial communication lacking genuine interaction has emerged among individuals who converse without looking at the person in front of them while their attention is reserved for their phones or another preferred method of disconnection from reality. Family members practically live alone even when physically within arm’s reach.

Whatever the reason, the cure for the miserable loneliness that a solitary “I” represents, is to spread the embracing perspective in our prayers to every aspect of our lives.

When the Bazaar Is Burning

As for the treatment of those who have become selfish and desensitized enough to say, “That is not my concern,” when a misfortune befalls someone else or even when people lose their lives, the prescription offered by Islam is holding onto the ties of brotherhood among Muslims. As stated in the hadith of our Prophet (sallallahu alayhi wa sallam), “Muslims are like the limbs of a body in loving, protecting, and showing mercy and compassion to each other. When any limb of the body is disturbed, the others also become feverish and get deprived of sleep” (Bukhari, Adab, 27; Muslim, Birr, 66). If we can be of help to Muslims who are suffering from this disease of the century and those feeling alone, if we can empathize with the material and spiritual suffering of our brothers and sisters in Islam and lose sleep over it, then we can say that we truly apply this hadith to our lives.

Junayd al-Baghdadi’s uncle and murshid, Maruf al-Karhi's student and one of the leaders of the Sufis from Baghdad, Sari as-Saqati (quddisa asrarahum) (d. 874), made istighfar for 30 years for saying “alhamdulillah” once. The incident is as follows:

Sari as-Saqati (quddisa sirruhu) owned a market stand in the Baghdad bazaar. One day, someone came running to him and said: "The whole bazaar of Baghdad burned down, only your shop was saved. Good tidings to you!"

The word “Alhamdulillah” spilled inadvertently out of Sari as-Saqati’s lips.

Later on, when he thought about the issue at length, he repented and asked for forgiveness for years because he had felt grateful without taking into account his brothers whose shops had been burned and thought only about himself.

May our Lord protect us from egotistical notions and feelings, from thinking only of ourselves, and consigning ourselves to solitude and isolation from the rest of the ummah: in other words, the way of shaytan. May He instill our hearts with the love of being united in the way of Allah and His Messenger (sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) and grant us an unwavering strength to live with an unbreakable bond of faith that links us with other believers. Like He did for Sari as-Saqati (quddisa sirruhu), may He give us the ability to think about our brothers and sisters in Islam and touch their lives by helping them in times of need, whether it be those who have lost and continue to lose their homes, livelihoods, and worldly possessions or those who have lost their religious values and unknowingly surrendered their eternal lives to a devastation that dwarfs the disasters in this world.

Abdülhamid Eşmeli